You might have seen videos on TikTok about “depleted mother syndrome” recently. If you’re a mom in America, chances are the term resonated with you. It seems to perfectly encapsulate the state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that many mothers experience. But what exactly is depleted mother syndrome, and is it a real thing or just a social media trend? Keep reading to find out.
What is Depleted Mother Syndrome?
Depleted mother syndrome, or DMS, refers to a condition where mothers, often those with small children, experience profound exhaustion and burnout. It’s characterized by a sense of overwhelm, chronic fatigue, emotional depletion, and a feeling of disconnection from other people and oneself.
Causes of Depleted Mother Syndrome
Several factors contribute to the onset of DMS. The relentless demands of caregiving, coupled with the pressures of balancing work, family, and personal life, can lead to chronic stress. Lack of adequate support systems, sleep deprivation, and neglecting self-care also play significant roles. While this can happen to mothers all over the world, it’s more likely to occur in places that lack adequate social safety nets, where mothers and young families are not prioritized in society. If motherhood is treated like a solo endeavor, and supports like affordable childcare or paid maternity leave are not available, it contributes to depleted mother syndrome.
Symptoms of Depleted Mothers
Symptoms vary but commonly include:
- persistent fatigue
- irritability
- feelings of guilt or inadequacy
- difficulty concentrating
- disrupted sleep patterns
- a loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed
Many mothers experiencing depleted mother syndrome also report physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, and digestive issues.
Is Depleted Mother Syndrome More Common in Single Mothers?
While DMS can affect mothers regardless of their marital status, single mothers often face additional challenges due to the sole responsibility of childcare and financial pressures. The absence of a co-parent to share responsibilities can exacerbate feelings of exhaustion and overwhelm.
How to Address Depleted Mother Syndrome
Addressing this condition involves a holistic approach to wellness:
1. Self-Care Practices: Prioritize self-care routines such as adequate sleep, nutritious diet, regular exercise, and relaxation techniques like meditation or yoga. It might be hard to develop these practices at first, but remember that the better you take care of yourself, the better you can take care of your kids, too.
2. Seek Support: Build a support network of friends, family, or support groups where you can share experiences and receive emotional support.
3. Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to additional responsibilities and delegate tasks whenever possible. Mothers tend to take on more than they can reasonably bear. But it’s not a failure to ask for help, to hire a housekeeper, or to put off folding the laundry while you get some rest.
4. Professional Help: Consider therapy or counseling to explore underlying stressors and develop coping strategies.
Depleted mother syndrome is a real phenomenon that many American mothers face. And even though you may know how important it is to take time for yourself or ask for support, you might still struggle with this when push comes to shove. You probably have so much subconscious programming around how moms are supposed to behave that whenever you try to make a change and prioritize yourself, you can’t find a way to actually do it. It can feel almost impossible to start putting yourself first.
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